Self-Esteem: Why is it Important and How to Improve It

So what exactly is self-esteem? Self-esteem is used interchangeably with the term Self-

Confidence many times. When I learned about Self-Esteem in graduate school to become

a Clinical Counselor, I learned a cool way to gauge a person’s self-esteem. A person with

low self-esteem would fail a test and internally think thoughts such as “I failed; therefore, I

am bad,” while an individual with high self-esteem would internally think “I did poorly on

the test because I didn’t study” and it does not affect their self-worth. Depending on how

you answered this question- you may benefit from Self-Esteem Counseling.

This type of work in therapy is going to be very personal to you as an individual. I find that

going back into a person’s past can help determine where a person’s confidence started to

tarnish. How we are treated as children very much determines how we think, act, and

perceive the world. This is why it is so important that children are taught by their caregivers

and teachers with constructive criticism so that they can understand when they do poorly

on something, that simply means they need more practice, and it does not determine who

they are as a person.

Some therapy techniques that are research-based and shown to help build self-esteem are Cognitive Behavioral therapy (CBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT),

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), Inner Child Work, Spirituality, Bowenian Family

Therapy, etc. The individual will essentially learn how to become aware of their inner critic

and how to disarm them. I use the analogy of learning to not bully yourself but be a hype-

man for yourself often. Because at the end of the day, if we cannot be in our own corner

how can we expect to be able to be there for another?

If you feel you may benefit from Self-Esteem counseling, allow us at The Fountains Counseling Center to come alongside you to help you see the strong, unique, and beautiful person that you are.

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